Mindset - Why Bother?

Mindset:

A set of beliefs or a way of thinking that determines one's behaviour, outlook and mental attitude.

When it comes to our mindset, we have probably heard heaps of motivational quotes designed to inspire us to change and become more positive in our thinking. Over the years, I have read these quotes and thought..."Yes! I am going to do that!' or 'I really love this quote but the reality is....(insert excuse here)'

 Is mindset really that important? 

 Do we actually need to be conscious of our self-talk?

 Is there any point to teaching our little humans how to do it?

 What has to happen for a change in mindset to actually stick?

The bottom line is - we want to be happy and live a happy life. We only get one chance to do it right.

And yet...we still move through our days with frustration or stress or overwhelm. I spent most of my life in overwhelm, which led to stress and frustration. I wasn't unhappy but I wasn't genuinely joyful, often enough. I would focus on what might go wrong, on all the possible problems. I was very problem-focused rather than solution oriented. I think to my friends, this may come as a surprise (or maybe not!) as it was mainly an internal struggle but it had an external impact.

It got in the way of any spontaneity in life and saying yes to experiences and friends more often because I was too busy worrying about everything, all the time.

If you do what you have always done you will get what you have always gotten.

Change is not only required....but necessary!

Is mindset important?

Absolutely. It affects every part of our days, our reactions, our relationships, our decisions, our feelings and emotions. Everything. It is the driver of our life. It sets the direction of the path we move forward on. 

Do we need to be conscious of our self-talk?

Oh my goodness! Yes! Self-talk is the most powerful form of communication because it either empowers you or defeats you. 

But have a think for a moment...where did your current self-talk come from? We are not born with these thoughts. They are heard and created. We have either heard, seen or experienced something when we were very little and we have made something up as a result of what we have seen, heard or experienced! They are not actually real! We have literally....just made them up! And because they have been created in our mind - we believe them without ever questioning them!

So let's start changing them to something good, inspiring and more loving towards ourselves - because we are totally worth it!

Is there any point to teaching our little humans to be conscious of their self-talk?

Absolutely yes! We have the most amazing opportunity to guide and teach our kids and give them the language that will empower them to be brave and confident and resilient and joyful! We are not born with that language either but it can be taught! 

Life is only as good as our mindset and we want to teach our kids to be excellent communicators and decision-makers, confident and compassionate, resilient and joyful human beings. 

Imagine if someone had taught you how to consciously change your thoughts when you were little?!

How do you make a change in mindset shift?

From personal experience...the only thing I did differently was to become more conscious - more aware of my own thoughts on a daily basis. But not only my thoughts, I had to be aware, recognise and acknowledge the emotions I was feeling. It was not always easy (and I am still a work in progress!) but the shift was worth it. The change is worth it. The struggle is totally worth it. Day by day by day. And then I learned how to grateful for now. Truly heartfelt gratitude for this moment and all the lessons life has given me to become who I am today. I was unconscious before. Unaware of how my thoughts were actually affecting me.

Why would we want our little humans to wait until adulthood to learn what we are learning now - when they are ready?

Children are the world's greatest mimics. They will watch and listen and then copy and do.

Check your mindset. Teach your kids. Every parent I talk to says they want a better life for their children. My mother said it, her mother said it to her and so on and I know that if you are a parent, you are probably saying it too. 

This is the cool part where parents and teachers get to work together on something that is bigger than themselves - to help our little humans to grow and develop with this positive and empowering language.

 What do you say to yourself that is disempowering? What can you say that lifts you up instead?

 What do you hear your partner and children say? How can you help them change what they are saying?

As you move through the week - take notice of when you feel frustration or stress or overwhelm or anger or other emotions. Then take a moment to think about where it is coming from and what you are actually telling yourself in that moment. You might find it very surprising!

Tip for your kids: Your brain is always listening! It is so cool that it does, thinks, feels and believes whatever you tell it - so let's tell it something positive/amazing/inspiring etc. 

Progress is impossible without change and those who cannot change their minds, cannot change anything.

Bernard Shaw 

Until next week...be kind to yourself

Clarissa xo