Emotion Express

Big boys don't cry. 

Little girls should be seen and not heard.

I know these are what we would probably consider 'old-fashioned' quotes and no doubt you have probably heard these at some point when you were younger. But the fact of the matter is, we may not be saying these exact words but we still unconsciously teach this to our little humans by what we say.

I am passionate about teaching our little humans that they are in control of themselves, their own emotions and behaviours. Being mindful of how we are feeling is important in order to learn how to respond and react to different situations we are in. It's why 'Talking to our Brains' and learning to manage our self-talk is so important. 

But...

What about our heart? 

Have you ever had those moments where you simply feel like all you need is a good cry?

You might not even know why!

This has been me most of this week! Don't ask me why because I honestly couldn't tell you!

I do know, however, that I am one of those people that try to keep it all together though. While I can easily cry in a sad movie, my pattern in life has been to stay in control and to keep it all together. If I am crying and I don't know why I judge myself for feeling a particular way and that creates even more angst. It's crazy...but I am pretty sure I am not alone here.

I learnt something this week that has really changed my thinking.

I learned that the only job of emotions - is to be expressed.

That's it. Nothing else. Feel the emotion, let it out, thank it and release it. But in order to release it, we must first surrender to the letting go. 

And that means giving up control.

I share these lessons with you this week, so that you may learn quicker than I did! I am still working on all of these things but am very quickly learning the importance of being okay with surrendering and expressing emotions!

 Emotion is energy

Emotions are what make us human. They are what make us real. It is important to educate ourselves on our emotions as much as our intellect. It is important to know how to feel, how to respond and how to let life in so that it can touch you. Opening our heart and allowing the emotional energy to flow through is the quickest way to healing.

 Tears are not pain. They are the healing.

I know a lot of people don't like to cry or don't like to be seen crying. Not all tears are from pain. Sometimes tears are simply your body's way of moving energy around and shifting things in order for you to heal and move through the emotion. Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, in order to see life with a clearer view again! 

It is important to remember that tears are not a sign of weakness but of power. They allow you to speak the fear, the grief, the love in a way that your mind can not. 

 The past is the past.

The knowledge of the past stays with us but to let go of the past is to release the memories and the emotions. It is about letting go of any grudges we are holding on to or any fears we are holding on to. Holding on to disappointments or memories that keep us in fear, only keep our spirit locked up. It is crying out to be free. The world needs you and your spirit to be free of your past pains in order to love freely and love openly today.

 Stop judging your emotions

Nobody is perfect. Nobody has it 'easy'. Everyone has their issues and things to work through. We spend a lot of time thinking other people are judging us but often we are judging ourselves more than others - especially when it comes to feelings and emotions. 

If you are judging your feelings as wrong or bad, you will not be able to access the gifts you need inside the feelings. We all experience the same emotions.

It's not easy to let go and surrender to the emotions if you are always trying to be in control. Here are the things that I am trying to remember and they are also the things I am teaching my little humans.

 Love the mess. Love who you are. You are already worthy. 

Loving ourselves (having loving self-talk) helps the pain and the wounds to dissipate. Not because they need to be gone,  but because you are already whole and beautiful and loved exactly as you are. 

Knowing and understanding this is where the healing comes from.

 Never apologise for being emotional or sensitive. It is a sign you have a big heart and people need you to show it. Showing your emotions is a sign of strength.

 Take comfort in expressing your emotions. It will allow you to share the best of yourself with others.  

 Feel the emotion but don't become the emotion. Witness it. Allow it to happen. Release it. Releasing the emotional energy and shifting your focus to acceptance of it being there, assists in releasing the anger and restoring the balance within your body.

Not being in control of your emotions will reveal your worst. Showing your emotions does not mean you are allowed to voice everything at any time whenever you feel like it. It is about releasing and letting go of your own pain through the heart and then talking to your brain to be in control of managing what follows and what emotion you choose next.

 Surrender. Surrendering is learning to move from the turmoil on the outside to developing and nurturing a peace on the inside.

When we suppress our emotional energy, it results in creating negative thoughts and self-talk. Our job is to be okay with releasing the emotions that are behind those thoughts.

 Cry, Laugh, Journal, Breathe. All of these things are good options to release emotions. When I say breathe, I am talking long, slow, deep breaths into the belly, pushing the heart forward. Every time I breathe deep, open up my arms and chest and push the heart out, the emotions flow. Releasing through the heart is the best way to move the energy.

The BEST thing we can do for ourselves and our little humans is to:

Acknowledge the emotion, surrender to the energy around it (if that means cry then cry!), say thank you for the emotion (for the lesson or the healing) and then let it go. 

It's okay to not be okay. We are all beautifully imperfect human beings. 

But in order to be okay, we must first acknowledge and surrender.

And understand....that to continue to hold on to your negative emotional energy is a choice.

THE ONLY JOB OF EMOTION IS TO BE EXPRESSED.

Until next week...remember to listen to your heart, feel the emotion and express it as it needs.

Clarissa xo